I've been sleeping on User Comment Rodeo posts lately because I got very, very tired of reading them and also because I haven't seen a lot of good or juicy ones,. but mostly I've been too lazy to make another User Comment Rodeo post and there have been other interesting things to talk about. Prefab Sprout and the 80s pop debacle, for instance. That is some of my best blogging, right there. Timely, informative, helpful, and could even save you if you get cornered by a pack of label-wary musicoholics.
So I was browsing the CBC news website, as usual, and found a rather well-written user comment with an actual structure (!) and some focus, plus it was written interestingly. It was in response to a story about oil prices or oil politics or something usually bitched about relentlessly but which is of considerable significance. Rarely do I find a level-headed, nonpartisan comment on CBC. If you read the old User Comment Rodeo posts, you can see a few descriptions of the archetypal comment posters. The rarest thing of all is that I found this post before anybody had voted for it, so it was in an ineffable state where nobody is opining or telling you what to think about the comment.
For those reasons and more I consider the following user comment worthy of an honour. The first User Comment Rodeo award of excellence, given only to comments of outstanding value, insight, and entertainment. I doubt I will go into ecstatics, but to be safe I will show the post before I discuss it:
Look at that beautiful 'zero' rating. Untouched, unsullied by idiots, fresh from the poster. And what a post. Goddamn Latin phrase indicating which group is unpleasant? Goddamn Latin phrase indicating the entire 'user comment' mentality and existence, man! But we can't be too surprised that intelligent or educated people use the CBC website.
Note the non-partisan appraisal of the situation. Harper is not at fault for oil prices. Goddamn right he isn't. If he had that much control all Canadians would be nerve-stapled cyborgs by now, and pulling him around on a sleigh. See the awesome dismissal of Harper, somewhat partisan, but seemingly more personal. That is beautiful commentary right there. If this was putting down a troll it would be a true masterpiece.
But this post doesn't need to put down trolls, because the Latin opening already takes care of the entire internet's population of trolls. Look at that unerring perspective, that perfect disclosure of chemical ignorance and naivete: the punctuation, grammar, and structure. Even the odd statistical fact is great. This user comment is like Vonnegut coming down from the heavens and blessing the illiterate and subliterate with pure bleak satire they'll never understand.
Sure there are a few misspellings. Sure the perspective is perhaps even a little too truthful for anybody who's grown up on lies and self-entitlement. Sure the metaphor is upper-brow and probably flawed, and even a little offensive to Monster Truck Enthusiasts... but it's true. That's good imagery even though it doesn't make one bit of sense. I value that kind of honesty that does not pick sides, does not preach, but rather says a thing straight up as it is.
And I understand that it's just a two-minute reaction by a person who I probably wouldn't even like, but that there is a good, perhaps even golden, user comment. Seeing that comment was better than reading the news story. Therefore it deserves to be seen, blogged about, and even honoured.
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